Finding My Own Way Again

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When I sat down the other day and wrote out all of the things that I was resisting…things that I miss doing kept coming up…

Before my youngest was born, I used to work pretty hard to put out a workshop a month…or as the time for him to arrive drew nearer, I put out two workshops per month.

Trust me, I had–and still have– a ton of outlines waiting to be worked into something useful.
Some of the workshops are short, quick, to the point.

I miss them.

I miss doing that work.

My favorite one—and the first one I ever created—is the Raven Journey.
I enjoy the format of that workshop.
I enjoy what showed up in that workshop.
I still return to that workshop, among others, and I learn something new every time.

However, the way I do things has changed completely since the time I was creating those workshops.
I mean, my entire way of looking at things, exploring things, reacting to things. I investigate things differently; I listen to things differently now…so much has changed in just a couple scant years.

I have been thinking – a lot…one thing that keeps coming up is I need to showcase my new style with a new free class…but I am still working on that…I have some ideas left over from the “time before Duncan” that are still sitting there, outlined, waiting to be put into action.

What is really interesting is that I found my list of things to create – I think it was for this year, although it could have been from last year…apparently I had a paper pinned to my bulletin board—that is used by every single person in the house uses…the paper fell off who knows when…but my daughter was digging through things recently and found it…and dropped it onto my desk…and then asked me about it a few days later since she dropped it onto a pile of other paperwork and I didn’t notice.

I have all these outlines…and I have all this work to do shifting things into my new perspective…

One thing that has shifted is that idea of my “core audience”–when I worked so hard to be … uhm … more palatable to more people…so I kept things on a certain level, rather than delving in as deeply as I wanted to into various aspects.

Now I know the audience to whom I wish to speak is : me.

I am creating the classes that I need, not that I haven’t had that idea before—I just didn’t follow it as closely as I should have.

The airy-fairy artsy-fartsy foot-in-both-worlds type, that’s me.

At some point, I may have to revisit my older workshops and update them. Now that’s an idea.

I do know I have more than enough notes and outlines on new work to keep me busy for a long time, not including the new work that keeps cropping up before me.

We’ll see what happens. I will keep you updated.

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