This Is Not Alice’s Wonderland

Alice In Wonderland is not my favorite fairy tale.

Yet…the name of this blog…and the blog that preceded it…refer to Alice In Wonderland.  I have several editions of the books about Alice, not only the original two tales.  I have much music and many movie of Alice and her adventures as well.

I admit, there is always a little Alice in everything I do.  You cannot get more fish-out-of-water feeling than our little Alice…and that is fairly much how I feel most days of my life…like I am in the wrong place and no one understands me or understands that.  That is the story of my life…isn’t it?

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The blog before this current one was called–on the wrong side of the mirror…and that did say quite a bit about where I felt my life was at that time.  It was a blessing in disguise that there was a fubar and I had to create this blog…this is my side of the mirror.  I am not the one in the wrong place…I talk to the flowers and they talk to me.  There are chatty squirrels and squirrelly birds…and bugs whose butts light right up at night…and I like it.

With my fish out of water issues…and the fact that I have land-bound mermaid feet issues, you might think that the little mermaid may be a better tale for me to embrace…but it isn’t.  My mermaid tale is a much darker, more mystical tale…and one that I shall not be telling here at this time.

So what is my favorite fairy tale?  Beauty and the Beast.

Imagine my delight recently when I came upon the show The Real Beauty And The Beast.  The movie itself is actually horrifying–the tales they tell of what happens to the children, to the man himself.  But it is a love story of sorts in the end.  And a lovely one at that.

It has always been a part of me to look beyond what lies outside, the masks we wear every day to face the world, physical looks and attributes, clothing, prestige, what car someone drives…I am known to even look past growly snarling anti-social types and actually get to know them.  A$$holes may be a$$holes no matter what, but most of the people that I know of that I take the time to get to know and to look past that nasty or aloof or indifferent facade show me…it really isn’t who they are.

One of my best friends from AR was one of those people that no one really liked because no one really understood her.  She was from MN, the land of the terse and taciturn.  What was friendly and out-going for her seemed to others of the area to be cold, indifferent, and rude.  I never cared.  Truthfully, until someone brought it to my attention, I actually never thought about it.  I just talked to her.  If I talked to her, she talked to me–and that made her ok in my book.  Others were put off by her demeanor.  I honestly didn’t notice what people were taking offense at, even after several other people brought it to my attention.  I thought they were weird and nuts–not her.  I actually did try to help those people see a different side of her…and I know that several people did change their opinions of her, somewhat, after I chatted them up.

I think the nicest thing ever said to me was by my very best friend.  We went to middle school and high school together.  So she knows me.  She told me that we were very much alike, but that I really did have that Southern thing going on.  What she meant by that was that I have this … ahem … gentility and gentleness about me when dealing with…people…even a$$holes…until you push me a bit too far…you do get the kind end of my stick…

Let’s just say that I too have that personality where … the term Ice Queen may well be used to describe me…mostly just because that’s how I am…quiet and reserved unless you really know…and sometimes even then too…but when faced with a room full of a$$holes, there’s no reason for me to participate, so I don’t.

I learned a long time ago to cultivate the energy that you wish to embody…so you surround yourself with the people more like what you wish to become.  I have long been surrounded by a$$holes because I give everyone a chance.  I give everyone several chances.  If you degenerate to the level of a$$hole in my eyes, that’s pretty much where you stay unless/until you make some major changes.  If I have learned nothing else in the past decade or so it’s not to cheapen myself nor lower myself to someone else’s standards.  If I cannot find the like-minded people I desire, I am perfectly fine remaining in my own little icy castle, singing to myself and my snowman army.  Just to make sure we get as many fairy tale alliterations in here as possible today…

Not quite where I anticipated today’s post going…but I’ll roll with it.